Things have gotten worse, nothing's going well this holiday.
Arguments, falling out, hatred, it's all over now.
I'm feeling much more relaxed.
Why do people assume? Why can't they just NOT assume when they haven't got the truth out yet?
I sure am a douchebag yeah? Haha, always the one scolding vulgarities. Always the one starting the quarrels, arguments and disagreements. Always the one being evil, mean. Always the one that don't remember things well. Always the one that is getting the "bad person" role. It's fine. I let it all go. But when my best friend sides with something else, what does that prove? There's no trust. So, how am I supposed to deal with this? Close one eye? Or ask her personally? I'm in a lost state rn. Not that I'm feeling super good about losing a close friend since yesterday, but how does that prove friendships really last? I'm being called ridiculous, crazy, unreasonable, damn vulgar and all sorts of other shit that I can't think of. Why? WHY? Why don't you guys put yourselves in my /FREAKING/ shoes before you even say anything in this argument when you aren't relevant. Don't even start on what a "GOOD" friend you are. Look, for this past year, I have cried, ranted, felt sad and frustration too many times that it's just fine after I wake up the next day, it's just like a daily routine. But in this number of times that I have been feeling those ways, how many times have you comforted me? How many times have you asked me what's wrong or even gave some concern? Not just that, I'm alwaaaaaaaaaaaays, always the one that has something going on in this "clique", so called. I don't even believe in any of them any more, maybe only 1. ONE. It's better than nothing. And to that you, thank you. :')
As to the rest of our so called "clique", thanks for the wonderful memories. For being crazy, stupid and retarded together. It meant a lot. Until this happened. I'm still wondering who my true friends are. I don't see the point in having many close friends, really. Cause some will still leave you after some time. And how thick skin can it get, when someone said they took all your bullshit, were there for you, when no one else was. When they weren't? Ha, funny how life can get. Please, think back, and see who the hell was the one that was there for you when no one else cared. Who was the one that asked you "What happened?", who was the one that called you up to make sure you were okay? I'll leave the answering to you. Back to the clique part, you, that particular you in this group of us, always siding here and there, being a 2 faced when you don't even realise. You, are the one that backstabs every single one, it's ok, backstabbing is totally O K A Y. Because everyone does that. But you act really close to any one of us when you leave another. It's really irritating. I don't think I'm making sense, so let's just skip it. I've had enough of ALL these crap and arguments. I'm so sick and tired of this. I'm not even lying. Sometimes I feel like dying, no one realises. I'm always dying inside, even when I show it, no one really bothers. LOL, what a joke. Never mind! It's fine. I'm sarah peh, the happy-go-lucky one. Let's end this misery and just stop being friends okay? :D And right, if you haven't realised, you proved that you aren't that bff I know anymore. So, it's over yeah? It's better for you and me, so I don't have to keep doubting my trust for you as a best friend. Ha.
Let's hope next year will be a better year for everyone.
xo.
friend
[frend]Show IPA
noun1.a person attached to another by feelings of affection orpersonal regard.2.3.a person who is on good terms with another; a person who isnot hostile: Who goes there? Friend or foe?4.a member of the same nation, party, etc.5.( initial capital letter) a member of the Religious Society ofFriends; a Quaker.
I don't understand what it means any more, even after checking the dictionary. Nope.We'll just be acquaintances after this.
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